Friedrich & Fletcher, S.C.

Why mediation often leads to better co-parenting outcomes

2026-04-28T08:14:47Z

Parents who divorce when their children are still at home choose mediation over litigation when they can for a number of reasons. The mediation process typically requires negotiation and compromise, while a litigated divorce is more likely to involve conflict, one-upmanship and stalemates. Parents who will be sharing physical custody and decision-making responsibilities for their children after divorce can benefit from learning to work together despite any hurt and anger they have about their own relationship. Mediating child custody and support matters can be an excellent start towards a new co-parenting relationship.

The advantages of mediation

Mediation provides more privacy than one that requires multiple filings with the court. It also typically requires less time and money – two things in short supply for many parents. Further, if the kids are old enough to understand that their parents are establishing their agreements (at least their child-related ones) through mediation, it can give them a sense of security that they will continue to work as a parenting team even if they’re no longer a couple. Each parent can benefit from having their own legal representative to provide guidance behind the scenes as they go through mediation. However, by not doing their negotiating and other communication through their attorneys, parents can work more closely to craft a parenting plan and other agreements that fit their children’s unique needs.

Mediation can help avoid toxic stress for children

Mental health professionals have identified divorce as one of about a dozen “adverse childhood experiences” (ACEs), along with physical, sexual and emotional abuse, that can cause toxic stress for children that follows them into adulthood. That’s why it’s critical for divorcing parents to always be cognizant of how their break-up is affecting their kids. Of course, a mediated divorce isn’t for every couple. If there’s considerable distrust or animosity, if there has been any kind of abuse or if one spouse can easily overwhelm and persuade the other, it’s better to handle it through the court, where a judge can make decisions on matters where the couple doesn’t agree. Unlike a judge, a mediator isn’t there to decide matters for the couple but to help them reach decisions together. For many divorcing parents, however, a mediated divorce can be an excellent way to begin a healthy co-parenting relationship that will continue long after their children become adults.

Is it appropriate to date during a Wisconsin divorce?

2026-04-25T23:25:41Z

Divorce is a stressful time when people may be in particular need of emotional support and company. The entire process can easily take a year or more, during which spouses may feel cut off from their communities and overall lonely. If they meet someone new while the divorce is in progress, spouses who are still technically married may consider starting a new relationship. After all, the divorce is already underway, which is a clear sign that the marriage is over. Is it legal, reasonable and appropriate to date during a Wisconsin divorce?

Dating during divorce is legal

First and foremost, those considering a new relationship while a divorce is still underway need to understand that a new dating relationship is not illegal. However, dating while a divorce is not yet complete can lead to practical complications. First and foremost, there is the consideration of how the choice might affect a judge's decisions during divorce. While Wisconsin is a no-fault divorce state, meaning that misconduct does not affect final rulings, a judge's perspective of the spouses can have a major impact on financial matters and child custody arrangements. A judge may question an individual's decision-making if they begin dating before a divorce is final, especially if there are children in the family. Additionally, dating before the divorce is over can easily lead to heightened levels of conflict between spouses. A spouse who was previously receptive to settling may become much angrier and combative when they learn about a new relationship. There are also the practical challenges of balancing the stress of divorce with a new relationship and possibly shared custody. Those who do decide to date during divorce generally want to be careful about establishing a clear timeline to defray concerns about adultery. They may want to hold off on making their new relationship social media official, at least temporarily. The circumstances surrounding both the marital relationship and the pending divorce influence how to navigate a new relationship as an old one ends. People often need help understanding the risks and consequences of the choices they make during a divorce. Discussing concerns with a divorce attorney can help those contemplating dating or starting something new avoid the most common pitfalls associated with overlapping the beginning of a new relationship with the end of a marriage.

A fresh chapter: Why the new year is a strategic time for divorce

2026-06-08T17:14:35Z

The holiday season often carries heavy emotional weight, making it a difficult time to address marital struggles. However, once the calendar turns to January, many people want to start with a clean slate. Filing for divorce in the New Year is not about giving up on your past. Instead, you are choosing a path toward personal growth and a healthier future. You deserve a life that aligns with your well-being, and taking this step now allows you to reclaim your peace of mind.

Why filings rise after New Year’s Day

Divorce attorneys often see a surge of inquiries in January, a trend called "Divorce Month." While academic studies actually show that filings usually peak in March once paperwork is done, the momentum towards a new beginning begins now. Many couples wait until the festivities end to avoid disrupting family traditions for their children. You are not alone in seeking a fresh start while the year is young. Understanding the timing and steps involved can help you feel more confident in your decision to move forward.

Financial and practical benefits

Starting the process early in the year offers logistical advantages. Wisconsin is a marital property state, meaning the law generally presumes an equal division of assets and debts acquired during the marriage. Initiating your filing in January provides ample time to navigate Wisconsin’s mandatory 120-day waiting period. Your marital status as of Dec. 31 determines your tax filing status, so starting now increases the likelihood of finalizing your divorce before the year ends, allowing for a cleaner break regarding your future tax returns and annual financial planning.

Steps to empower the transition

Preparation is the key to a smoother divorce process. Focus on these essential tasks:

Gather documents: Collect W-2s, property deeds and recent bank statements
Build support: Identify a trusted circle of friends or a licensed therapist
Consult counsel: Meet with an experienced divorce attorney to understand child placement and marital property laws

These proactive steps help you regain a sense of control over your circumstances and provide your lawyer with the tools needed to protect your interests. Moving forward with a clear plan ensures you build your new life on a solid financial and emotional foundation. Choosing to move forward is a brave step toward the life you want to lead. At [nap_names id="FIRM-NAME-1"], our skilled and caring lawyers are ready to help you pursue a stable and bright future. Contact us today at [nap_phone id="LOCAL-REGULAR-NUMBER-3"] or fill out our online form to schedule a consultation.

3 Benefits of Limited-Scope Legal Counsel for Self-Representation

2025-11-04T22:13:24Z

Navigating a legal matter on your own can feel empowering, but it can also be overwhelming. Many people choose to represent themselves, especially in family law cases, to maintain control and manage costs. However, you don't have to choose between full representation and going it completely alone. Limited-scope legal counsel offers a supportive middle ground. This approach allows you to handle most of your case yourself while getting expert legal advice exactly when you need it.

Here are three key benefits of using limited-scope counsel.

1. You Control the Costs

One of the biggest worries in any legal process is the cost. With limited-scope counsel, you decide how much or how little assistance you need. You can hire an attorney for a specific task, such as reviewing a marital settlement agreement, explaining the implications of a financial disclosure, or preparing for a hearing. This unbundled approach means you only pay for the services you use, giving you complete control over your legal budget.

2. You Gain Confidence and Clarity

Legal forms and procedures can be confusing. While you may be capable of filling out the paperwork, you might not be aware of the long-term consequences of your choices. An attorney can review your documents, highlight potential pitfalls, and explain your options in plain language. This guidance ensures you understand the full impact of your decisions, empowering you to move forward with confidence and peace of mind.

3. You Get Targeted Expert Advice

Some parts of a case are more complex than others. For example, dividing retirement accounts or determining spousal support can have significant financial implications that aren't immediately obvious. Limited-scope counsel allows you to tap into an experienced attorney’s knowledge for these specific challenges. We can provide the crucial insights you need to protect your rights and secure your future, without taking over your entire case.

[nap_names id="FIRM-NAME-1"] is Here to Support You

You don't have to navigate your legal journey alone. Our compassionate team in Madison is here to provide the support you need, on your terms. If you believe limited-scope counsel could be the right fit for you, we invite you to reach out.

What Not to Say in Child Custody Mediation in Wisconsin

2025-11-04T22:13:10Z

Child custody mediation can be a challenging process for any parent. It’s an opportunity to work collaboratively with the other parent to create a custody agreement in the best interest of your child. However, the way you conduct yourself and the words you choose can significantly impact the outcome. Here are key examples of what not to say during child custody mediation in Wisconsin.

1. Speaking Negatively About the Other Parent

One of the biggest mistakes in child custody mediation is badmouthing the other parent. Regardless of your personal feelings, criticizing your co-parent can make you appear uncooperative and focused on conflict instead of resolution. Mediators and the courts want to see that both parents can prioritize the child’s needs above personal grievances. Keep discussions respectful and constructive to demonstrate you are solution-oriented.

2. Making Unrealistic or Unreasonable Demands

Avoid the temptation to push for sole custody or unrealistic arrangements without a compelling reason supported by facts. Approaching mediation with rigid demands or unwillingness to compromise may signal to the mediator that you’re not interested in finding workable solutions. Instead, approach the process with a willingness to listen and negotiate in good faith.

3. Losing Focus on Your Child’s Best Interests

It’s natural to feel emotional during mediation, but losing sight of your child’s needs can backfire. Statements prioritizing your convenience or wishes over your child’s well-being might make the mediator question your commitment to creating a custody plan that serves your child. Before suggesting any arrangement, ask yourself if it truly benefits your child—not just you.

4. Making False or Exaggerated Claims

Dishonesty can derail the process entirely. False accusations or exaggerated claims against the other parent are not only unproductive, but they can also damage your credibility. Stick to facts, focus on finding solutions, and avoid needless drama that takes away from the goal—your child’s stability.

Get Expert Legal Guidance

Child custody mediation requires patience, cooperation, and a focus on your child’s best interests. What you say (and what you don’t) can make a meaningful difference in the outcome. By maintaining respect, managing emotions, and prioritizing your child’s needs, you can approach mediation with confidence.

If you’re facing child custody mediation in Wisconsin and need personalized guidance, we’re here to help. Contact [nap_names id="FIRM-NAME-1"] today filling out our contact form or calling [nap_phone id="LOCAL-CT-NUMBER-1"]. Our experienced attorneys in Madison are ready to support you every step of the way.

Should I use mediation or litigation for my divorce?

2025-05-09T19:54:36Z

One of the first, and often most important, decisions to make when getting a divorce is which legal process is right for your divorce. It is important to remember that although divorce is the end of a romantic relationship it also entails very specific legal steps akin to ending a contract. Thankfully, there are options available and those going through a divorce can choose the one that works best for their situation. Two common options are mediation and litigation. Understanding the differences between these two paths can help you make an informed decision that suits your unique situation.

#1: Divorce mediation

In divorce mediation, a neutral third-party mediator facilitates a conversation between you and your spouse to reach a mutually acceptable agreement. This process is often less adversarial and more collaborative than litigation. Pros:

Less expensive than litigation
Faster resolution than litigation
More control over the outcome
Less stress and conflict

Cons:

May not be suitable for high-conflict or abusive relationships
Requires cooperation and compromise from both parties
May not be effective if one party has a significant power imbalance

During mediation, you and your spouse will meet with the mediator to discuss and resolve issues such as property division, child custody, and spousal support. The mediator will guide the conversation, helping to better ensure discussion of all necessary topics. Once an agreement is reached, it will be drafted into a legally binding document.

#2: Divorce litigation

In divorce litigation, you and your spouse will hire separate attorneys to represent your interests in court. This process can be more adversarial and formal than mediation. Pros:

May be necessary in high-conflict or abusive relationships
Can provide a sense of vindication or justice
Allows for a more formal and structured process

Cons:

Often more expensive than mediation
Can be a lengthy and emotionally draining process
May result in an outcome that neither party is satisfied with
During litigation, your attorney will prepare and present your case to a judge, who will make decisions on your behalf. This process can involve multiple court appearances, discovery, and potentially a trial.

Remember, choosing the right path for your divorce is an important first step. By understanding the differences between mediation and litigation, you can make an informed decision that sets you up for a brighter future. If you are facing a divorce, do not hesitate to reach out to our experienced family law attorneys. Contact us through our website to schedule a consultation and take the first step towards a successful resolution.

5 common mistakes to avoid during your divorce

2025-02-04T21:40:37Z

Going through a divorce can be a highly emotional and stressful experience. It is easy to make hasty decisions based on feelings rather than facts, which can lead to long-term regrets. What mistakes should you avoid?

Mistake #1: Making emotional decisions

It is crucial to keep your emotions in check. You should make based on logic and legal advice, not out of spite or anger. For instance, venting frustrations about your ex on social media might feel cathartic. However, they could use those posts against you in court. Keep communications respectful and think twice before posting anything online.

Mistake #2: Keeping financial secrets

Unfortunately, keeping financial secrets from a partner is common, with around 40 percent of adults failing to tell their partner the truth about their finances. However, in divorce, lying about your assets can lead to legal penalties and a loss of credibility in court. Transparency about your finances and assets is not only fair but legally required in most divorce proceedings. You should all financial documentation is accurate and complete to facilitate a fair division.

Mistake #3: Assuming divorce must be a fight

Before heading straight to litigation, consider alternative dispute resolution methods like mediation. Choosing a mediated divorce can save time, reduce costs, and often lead to better outcomes for both parties.

Mistake #4: Putting your child in the middle

It is important to shield your children from any conflict during the divorce process. Avoid using them as leverage or messengers between you and your spouse. Focus on their well-being and strive for co-parenting arrangements that prioritize their stability and happiness.

Mistake #5: Not getting legal representation

While it might be tempting to save money by not hiring a lawyer, professional legal counsel is crucial. A skilled divorce attorney can help you navigate the legal system, protect your rights, and ensure a fair settlement. Divorce is undoubtedly challenging, but avoiding these common mistakes can help ensure the process goes as smoothly as possible.

Understanding the divorce process in Wisconsin

2024-12-12T21:45:30Z

In a divorce, the decisions you make can impact your life and your finances long after you end your marriage. Knowing how the divorce process works can help you manage expectations and prepare effectively. What should you know?

What does the divorce process look like in Wisconsin?

The divorce process in Wisconsin involves several different stages:

Filing for divorce: Filing a divorce petition with the court is the first step in the divorce process. This petition includes information about both spouses, the marriage and any initial proposals for dividing property, custody of children and other details.
Serving divorce petition: The spouse who files must then give the other spouse the divorce papers to officially inform them of the divorce.
Temporary orders: Either spouse can ask the court for temporary orders. These orders might cover child custody, child support, spousal support or use of shared assets. They provide important relief and structure during the divorce process.
Divorce hearing: After all paperwork is complete and both spouses have had a chance to present their views – whether through negotiation, mediation or trial – the court will set a date for a hearing. This is when the court makes final decisions about all aspects of the divorce.
Finalizing the divorce: Once the judge approves the agreements, the divorce becomes final when they sign the divorce decree.

How long does the divorce process take?

The length of the divorce process depends on your situation. If you and your spouse generally agree, the process may not take long. If you have significant disagreements that require negotiations or trial, the process can take much more time. It is important to note, however, that Wisconsin courts cannot finalize the divorce until 120 days have passed since the you filed the divorce papers. This means that your divorce will take at least 120 days to complete.

How long do you have to live in Wisconsin before you can get a divorce?

Before you can file for a divorce in Wisconsin, you or your spouse must have lived in the state for six months or more. You must also have lived in the county where you will file for at least 30 days.

Do you have to prove fault to get a divorce?

Wisconsin is a no-fault divorce state. This means that you can get a divorce without showing that your spouse was unfaithful, abusive or showed some other serious fault. The only requirement is that one spouse must testify that the marriage is irretrievably broken. Making informed choices during the divorce process is a key part of achieving a fair outcome. Seeking legal guidance from an experienced divorce attorney and learning more about the divorce process can help you protect your rights.